Here’s something I wrote a while ago about being in practice. After I wrote it I went on a binge of chocolate and tv for a couple days. No discipline whatsoever.
I am oftentimes in a state of becoming or disintegrating, never present, distracted from the real practice. I have “goals” aka limitations. All of which inhabits me is my being. Suffering, greed, pride, determination, etc. In the past I have escaped. I have disassociated. Searching for the container which will “fulfill” me. Only as of late have I become the content which fills any container. In other words, I am in practice, the practice. This is the practice of self evolution, not a state of becoming, not a state of accumulation, not a state of cultivation. I am never complete in this practice, always a work in progress, never stagnant. In my current practice I am making use of certain containers. Containers like fighting, floreio, art, and somatic practices as well. I am open, not identified with one container. Each of them contains content which I absorb.
The real practice cannot be imitated. It cannot be turned into a routine. It cannot be transformed into a regimented program to produce any state of being. It is being in practice. This is a high level of abstraction compared to its copycat counterpart. That which is copy-able and conceptualized. The real practice cannot be faked. It entails honest suffering in alignment with awareness. It is not identified with a container, it is the content that fills it. Those in practice take that content and become it. They use it to transform themselves. They have the capacity to toss the container and keep the content. The real thing is not visible, neither is it easily comprehensible. It is not popular. It is not a means to strengthen the self.
Take care not to distort the practice after some degree of “success” is made evident. This is an easy trap to fall into. As I mentioned, containers are necessary for the delivery of the content. Furthermore, this means the practice cannot be completely improvised, nor can it be completely structured aka copyable. A dynamic mix of structure and improvisation is required. “Goals” are to be set, “routine” is to be developed, however, this structure is not cultivated by any means of strengthening one’s sense of self, instead, it is made in awareness of the greater practice. It is used, because some degree of structure is required for the accumulation of the superficial surface-level transformation, which hides in it the content. This content is what we take from the structured, isolated practice. It is then integrated into the main practice, the self evolution, the improvised practice, the spontaneity of life. Combine the self-practice with the collective knowledge.
I’ll address another trap which I’ve found myself in sometimes. This is the pursuit of something external in regards to strengthening my sense of self, and even sneakier, my sense of the real practice. Nothing of any external means can develop you more than you. In the words of Ido Portal, “the higher technology the body uses, the lower the technology of the body.” Any external accumulation for “the practice” is a diminishment of your sense of your own faculties. All of what you need comes directly from you. Practice bits, as Ido says. Practice the containers, become the content, and throw the rest away. A real practice spills out from the essence of your being and into the world. It cannot be obtained through systemic imitation alone, materialistic accumulation, or any form of cultivation. It is an openness to what is. So be the practice. Peace.
– Charlie
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